My client is still prepared to consider reconciliation.

- Intolerable Cruelty (2003).

N-ex-T...

*I did not bake those cakes but my gaaaaaawd I wish I did.

So if you read this miserable little post you'll know where I'm coming from here. Recently my long term relationship loved up in a little bubble forever best friend text me:

"I really do want to console you but I don't know how, I googled it and it said to tell me to tell you to meditate."

I just... no.
 So this wee post right here is my list of steps to banish the break up blues...

1. Listen to this.

Still in the onesie? Who cares, grab your hairbrush, sing (not like this girl) and dance like no-body's watching... I really hope no-body was watching. 

2. Eat ice cream.

ALL the ice cream.

3. Exercise

Honestly. Exercise releases happy hormones & endorphines and blahhh blahhh blaaah. Running is cheap & accessible, though you might want to take out a gym membership to get access to the punchbag.

4. Grab your girls.

Shot back that tequila and pop out your best Beyonce moves on a dancefloor full of people way younger than you. Hey, every girl has to kiss a few ducks before she finds her prince.

5. Plan a trip.

Go all out, stick it to that spending ban and hit the sun with your besties.

6. Read Bridget Jones.

I promise it'll make you feel better.

I am not an alcoholic, I am not an alcoholic, I am not an alcoholic.

7. Rediscover yourself.

Something you wanted to do for a while but put it off? Do it now. Dye your hair, pierce your ears, just don't do anything rash... or stupid.

8. Remember you're never alone.

Those sympathy eyes doing your head in yet? Remember they always mean well.

9. Get new shoes.

Or re-discover old shoes. Or look at some shoes. Just shoes at all times, basically.

10. Look at this picture.

But remember R.G is, and always will be, my imaginary husband.

What do you think?

What are your break-up rules?

x

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